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Domestic Violence Rises In New York City

April 6, 2012

How’s this for the first sentence of an article “As funding has steadily dwindled to help New Yorkers escape domestic violence situations, the number of deaths from abuse has sharply increased in the past three years.” Yikes!

That is the opening of an article that appeared in The Metro newspaper, a free commuter newspaper (http://www.metro.us/newyork/local/article/1139269—the-big-issue-as-budgets-drop-domestic-violence-on-the-rise-in-new-york).  The article goes on to say “Advocates are worried that, as the city puts together next year’s budget, the City Council will not renew funding for groups that help domestic violence victims.” The article also points out that murder from domestic violence went up in 2011 to 92 deaths vs. 77 reported in 2010.

No one really can say with certainty what has caused the increase but it is widely believed that the recession has caused more stress in families. I am not surprised. Funding has been cut in many localities for domestic violence which means that shelters have no choice but to scale back on services. It’s a vicious cycle and many women and their families will remain at risk.

The money from the city is used for a number of programs like legal help and housing. If victims can’t get affordable housing they may have no choice but to return to the abuser. If funding cuts persist more women and their children will remain at risk.

Posted 6 weeks ago

VAWA Still In Limbo

April 5, 2012

 

VAWA (The Violence Against Women Act) is still in limbo. According to an article in The Seattle Times (http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2017895763_violence03m.html) the Senate will take up the reauthorization of VAWA later this month.

As the article states “The legislation would continue grants to local law enforcement and shelters for battered women; expand services to Indian reservations and rural areas; add more free legal assistance for victims; and add “stalking” to the behaviors considered domestic violence.” The proposed bill would also cut spending by 17% from the 2005 level.

VAWA has always been re-authorized by unanimous consent. Now it’s a political football - and the lives of victims and their families are at stake. It’s important to keep the pressure on your Senator’s and Congresspersons (http://www.usa.gov/Contact/Elected.shtml) and let them know that VAWA must be reauthorized. You’ll be helping a lot of women in need if you do.

On behalf of those women, thank you.

Posted 6 weeks ago

Children Who Witness Domestic Violence Have Lower IQs

April 4, 2012

 

The list of identified adverse effects due to domestic violence keeps growing. Yesterday MarketWatch reported that a new study completed by the researchers at Boston Children’s Hospital and the Institute of Child Development at the University of Minnesota shows that “children exposed early in life to interpersonal trauma (maltreatment or witnessing partner violence against their mothers) have lower IQ-related scores at 2, 5 and 8 years of age” (http://www.marketwatch.com/story/maltreatment-or-witnessing-family-violence-can-lower-a-childs-iq-2012-04-03).

 

According to Michelle Bosquet Enlow, PhD of the Department of Psychiatry at Boston Children’s Hospital “You can think of trauma as an environmental toxin similar to lead.” “Just as we need to eradicate lead exposure to protect IQ, we hope our results will spur efforts to identify families at risk and intervene to prevent this from happening. Maltreatment and violence exposure tend to be seen as criminal justice or social service issues, but they’re also important public health issues.”

 

Ms. Bosquet Enlow likened the effects of domestic violence on children as a public health issue similar to lead! Domestic violence hurts us all and now we know that the futures of millions of children are at stake.

Posted 6 weeks ago

Workplace Homicides and Domestic Violence

 April 2, 2012

A recent study talks about the role of domestic violence (aka intimate partner violence) has on workplace homicides of women.  According to the report (http://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S1047279712000245?via=sd )  “between 2003 and 2008, 648 women were feloniously killed on the job. The leading cause of workplace homicide for U.S. women was criminal intent, such as robbing a store (n = 212; 39%), followed by homicides perpetrated by a personal relation (n = 181; 33%). The majority of these personal relations were intimate partners (n = 142; 78%). Over half of workplace homicides perpetrated by intimate partners occurred in parking lots and public buildings (n = 91; 51%).”

Many of us have read news reports of women who have been murdered by their intimate partner at work – and this report clarifies what we all know – women are killed at work by their intimate partners. This obviously creates great demands on companies of all sizes and types.

 Intimate partner violence goes to work and every employer needs to put in place procedures to keep all employees safe. A perpetrator’s target may be his partner but other employees can get caught in the cross fire. 

What is your company doing to deal with workplace violence caused by intimate partner violence? If you need a plan (and you do!) contact me at nancy@thebusinessofme.com.

Domestic violence is a very public issue that affects every employer and yes, it can happen at your company!

Posted 6 weeks ago

Postpartum Depression Tied To Domestic Violence

March 30, 2012

According to an article in Reuters (http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/03/29/us-postpartum-idUSBRE82S16N20120329) moms who suffer from postpartum depression are “more likely to be in a violent relationship than moms without depression and new mothers in abusive relationships are more likely to suffer postpartum depression, according to a new survey of women with infants.”

The results of this study are not surprising to me. Domestic violence is a cause of many physical and mental/emotional conditions and based on this study we can now add postpartum depression to the list.

                                                            

Posted 7 weeks ago

Tasteless

March 29, 2012

Many of you may have heard about the restaurant Chops and Hops in Watkinsville, Georgia that received a lot of attention when it posted its recent “celebrity sandwich” of the week on Facebook. The celebrity sandwich of the week was the “Black &Bleu”.  Part of the description of the sandwich states “Put your hands on this caribbean black and bleu sandwich. Caribbean spiced marinated sliced ribeye blackened then look out for the bleu cheese, sliced tomato, silver Lamborghini onions, and shredded romaine. Chris Brown won’t beat you up for eating this unless your name starts with an R and ends with A.” This is not the first time the restaurant “poked fun” at a celebrity. After Whitney Houston died the celebrity sandwich of the week was topped with powdered sugar and sea salt which obviously poked “fun” at her cocaine addiction.

The Facebook post created a number of comments and news articles (http://rapfix.mtv.com/2012/03/28/sandwich-named-after-rihanna-chris-brown/) about the celebrity sandwich of the week. The comments ran the gamut from praise to complete distain for the restaurant.

The restaurant certainly capitalized on the old adage “any publicity is good publicity”.  I know a number of eateries that have celebrity named dishes but none of them exploits tragedy. In my opinion Chops and Hops is employing “tasteless” marketing tactics and I am appalled. Enough said….

Posted 7 weeks ago

New York State Needs To Pass The Aggravated Domestic Violence Bill

March 27, 2012

According to a story reported in the New York Daily News (http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/manhattan-da-cyrus-vance-calls-tougher-domestic-abuse-laws-article-1.1050147) at the current time, in New York, the sentence for beating your intimate partner is the same as jumping a turnstile. Also according to the article if someone hurts his partner over and over he still receives “the same penalty he did the first time — a mere misdemeanor”.

The good news is the “Aggravated Domestic Violence Bill” to increase sentencing for repeat abusers passed the Assembly a year ago. The bad news is the bill was shelved by the state Senate Republicans last week. It seems that the state Senate is too busy with other bills. The Republicans claim that the Democrats have put forth over 300 bills and they can’t figure out the priorities – DUH!

This reason astounds me. I, like many of you, have worked for companies where “everything” is a priority and needed to get done – so we would do what we needed to do to “get it done”. My message to NYS assembly is DO IT – and don’t’ give us any lame excuses about determining priorities.

If you live in NY and are as appalled as I am contact your NYS Senator and tell them to pass the “Aggravated Domestic Violence Bill” (use this link to contact your senator http://www.nysenate.gov/senators).

Posted 7 weeks ago

Vote Them Out Of Office

March 26, 2012

My Facebook friend Debby Eisemann shared this link (http://www.addictinginfo.org/2012/03/13/wisconsin-gop-to-battered-women-dont-get-divorced/).  Many of you may know about Wisconsin Representative Don Pridemore who believes that single parenthood is akin to child abuse. He says that knowing full well that most single parent households are headed by women.

His misogynistic views also spill over into domestic violence. He believes women who are abused by their partners should not seek divorce.  According to Representative Pridemore “If they can refind those reasons and get back to why they got married in the first place it might help.” He is obviously clueless about domestic violence. As we know domestic violence is about power and control not about “refinding the reasons they got married in the first place.” Ironically, Mr. Pridemore also chairs the “Children and Families” Committee – unbelievable!  So his views carry a lot of weight.

There are Don Pridemore’s in many states – and they are developing and passing legislation that is harmful to women.  The good news is Mr. Pridemore is up for re-election in 2012, so the women of 99th District in Wisconsin can take a stand and vote him out!

Many of you know that I do not write about or involve myself in politics – my concern is helping victims of domestic violence. Unfortunately there are many public officials who believe that we are living in 1912 not 2012 and would roll back women’s rights – and this is deadly for women and their children.

We can all write and talk about how outrageous Mr. Pridemore and those like him are but the real power we have is in the voting booth. I urge all of you to find out about the views of all your elected officials on the local, state and federal level and  if their views are harmful to you and your children – like Mr. Pridemore’s – then vote him and others like him out of office! We can show them that we are not going to tolerate their misogynist views any longer.

Posted 7 weeks ago

Domestic Violence Is A Workplace Issue

March 23, 2012

Domestic violence does not “stay home” it goes to work too.  Millions of victims work in companies across the country and this presents a major safety issue for employers. According to an article in Fortune (http://money.cnn.com/2008/11/18/news/Domestic_violence_morris.fortune/index.htm) “contrary to popular opinion, studies show that battered women are more likely to be employed than not. And spousal abuse occurs at work with surprising regularity”. I know – I was one of those working women who endured domestic violence.

Domestic violence abuses the bottom line of every employer. Domestic violence causes companies billions of dollars of lost productivity, lost work days and increased costs due to turnover and retraining. It also increases medical insurance costs (it is estimated that approximately $4 billion of increased medical costs are attributed annually to domestic violence). Security of all employees is at risk and it affects overall morale as other employees fear for their safety.

Domestic violence is not only a human problem…It’s a bottom line problem….What will you do?

According to the Fortune article many CEOs are saying “it’s time for corporate America to confront the issue head-on. Domestic violence affects the bottom line, they say. It threatens workplace safety. As an HR issue, it’s much more volatile and potentially more dangerous than drug addiction or alcoholism.”

Don’t wait until a tragedy happens at your office before you take action – the lives of all your employees are at stake and it is up to you to ensure their safety – and I can help. Contact me at nancy@thebusinessofme.com for information about how to keep your employees safe at work.

Posted 8 weeks ago

The Mirkarimi Problem - Police and Domestic Violence

Sheriff Ross Mirkarimi of San Francisco has pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge of false imprisonment regarding an incident in which he allegedly inflicted a bruise on his wife, Eliana Lopez, during a heated argument. Sheriff Mirkarimi is an elected official.  San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee has filed official misconduct charges against Mirkarimi (http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2012/03/20/MN601NNR16.DTL). It will now be up to the Board of Supervisors to vote to remove him.

Sheriff Mirkarimi is one of many police officers who have been accused of domestic violence. I did a Google search and found that there were sixteen police officers, on just the first two Google page results, that were arrested on domestic violence charges– obviously Mirkarimi is not alone.

According to an article published in Sanctuary for the Abused (http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2009/07/when-abuser-is-police-officer.html) “All abusers employ similar methods to control and abuse their intimate partners. Officers however, have an arsenal of skills and tactics not commonly possessed by civilians. Professional training in the use of force and weapons, intimidation, interrogation and surveillance techniques along with the cultural climate coalesce into a dangerous and potentially lethal combination in a domestic situation.”

An article in JSOnline in Milwaukee, Wisconsin (http://www.jsonline.com/watchdog/watchdogreports/police-department-ignores-national-standards-for-officers-accused-of-domestic-violence-132868198.html) states “officers who abuse their spouses or romantic partners are allowed to keep their jobs, carry loaded weapons and respond when battered women call for help.”   This is frightening!

Sheriff Mirkarimi is the most high profile police officer accused of domestic violence - there are many others we never hear about. My hope is that this opens a real discussion about how police organizations should deal with those officers and find ways to keep their partners safe.

Posted 8 weeks ago

Browsing Archive: February, 2010

What Is Governor Paterson Thinking?

Posted by Maurice Bretzfield on Saturday, February 27, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

Bob Herbert a columnist for The New York Times Op-ed today is titled “Paterson on the Brink”.  In his column he asks some very tough questions of Governor Paterson.

New York’s Governor Paterson and some in his administration seem to be shielding one of his closest advisors David Johnson from an ugly domestic violence issue.

Mr. Johnson violated his longtime companion by stripping off most of her clothes, choking her, slamming her against a dresser and preventing her from calling for h...


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Honoring Rajaan Bennett

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Friday, February 26, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

Rajaan Bennett had a wonderful future ahead. He was an honor student and a star running back who lead his Georgia high school team to its first undefeated season. He just received notice that he had gotten a full scholarship to Vanderbilt University.  He dreamed of becoming an architect. Now his dreams are over.

Rajaan Bennett is dead. He was shot to death by his mother’s former boyfriend. He died a hero trying to save his mother, his younger sister and his uncle.

You can read about Raja...


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Domestic Violence Is A Social Issue Not A Political Issue

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Thursday, February 25, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

On February 23, 2010 The Washington Post had an article titled “Reid links rise in domestic abuse to unemployment; critics say tie is overblown”.  The article points out that Senator Reid has linked unemployment to the rise in domestic violence incidents. Senator Reid was highly criticized for that remark by some critics.

The group (and the most important group) who did agree with Senator Reid is battered women’s advocates who see their case load increase week after week. Yes it is tr...


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Another Light In The Fight Against Domestic Violence

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Tuesday, February 23, 2010, In : Safety 

The National Domestic Violence Hotline (http://www.ndvh.org/) receives over 21,000 calls per month from victims, survivors, family and friends, law enforcement professionals and the general public. The Hotline has advocates who provide support and assistance to anyone involved in a domestic violence situation, including same-sex relationships, male survivors, those with disabilities and immigrant victims of domestic violence. All calls to the National Domestic Violence Hotline are anonymous a...


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If He Hits You Once He Will Hit You Again

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Monday, February 22, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

Dr. Jeanne King PhD wrote an article titled “Domestic Abuse Therapy - 4 Fundamental Steps to Dismantling Your Partner's Denial”. Dr. King outlines a series of steps to help the abuser realize and understand the ramifications of their behavior.

I am not a therapist or psychiatrist; I am a survivor of domestic violence. All I know is if he hits you once he will probably hit you again, and again, and again. And yes you may love him but sometimes you may have no choice but to leave the rela...


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Teen Intimate Partner Violence Statistics

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Friday, February 19, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

I recently wrote a post about some statistics regarding adult women and domestic violence. The statistics were startling.  After that post I decided to find statistics regarding teens and Intimate Partner Violence.

Here’s what I found….

724 adolescent mothers between the ages of 12-18: one of every eight pregnant adolescents reported having been physically assaulted by the father of her baby during the preceding 12 months. Of these, 40 percent also reported experiencing violence at the ...


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Why Women Stay in Abusive Relationships

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Thursday, February 18, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

I am a survivor of domestic violence. For 20 years I lived 2 lives, one a competent corporate executive and the other a behind closed doors abused wife. I am often asked why I put up with the abuse for so many years and sometimes in an accusatory fashion. I don’t have an answer as to why I stayed for so long in that relationship.  

All too often people assume that women stay or return to domestic violence relationships because they have low self-esteem. However, the reasons women stay or r...


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A Knipple - Every Woman Needs One

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Tuesday, February 16, 2010, In : Economic Abuse 

Knipple is a Yiddish word which means a “woman’s private stash”. It is a stash of money that is kept by her secretly.

I learned about the term in the book “Money, A Memoir: Women, Emotions and Cash”  by Liz Perle . Ms. Perle relates a story from her childhood about her grandmother who insisted that she always have a knipple.  

Ms. Perle’s grandmother explains that a knipple is “a just in case account” that is her’s alone so that she can do with it as she pleases and also ...


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A Poem

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Sunday, February 14, 2010, In : I AM Prosperous 

Selina Ingram wrote a beautiful poem for The Business of Me and for all women who have endured domestic violence and since this is Valentine’s Day I wanted to share it with you. Enjoy!

 

Thank you Selina for your wonderful enlightening words…..

 

 

I AM worthy
I AM whole
I hold the key to unlock my potential
I AM calm 
I AM peaceful
I AM happy
I AM light 
I AM love 
I AM joy 
I AM ready to receive abundance
I AM ready to receive love
I release all negative thought and images into the light
I for...


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Another Light in the Fight Against Domestic Violence

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Sunday, February 14, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

The Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence (www.caepv.org) is an organization that, since 1995, has brought together dozens of progressive companies to exchange ideas, collaborate on projects and use their influence to combat domestic violence.

Their mission is to aid in the prevention of partner violence by leveraging the strength and resources of the corporate community. The Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence believes that business can play an essential role in raising awarenes...


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Honoring Shereen Beaulieu

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Thursday, February 11, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

Shereen Beaulieu was murdered by her husband Bob Beaulieu. Here is Shereen’s story http://www.weau.com/home/headlines/84078197.html.

Every week I read about at least one woman who has died at the hands of an intimate partner.

Domestic Violence hurts us all!


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A Wonderful Article

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Tuesday, February 9, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

Katherine Bennett wrote an article for the Hingham Journal. The title of the article is “CHANGING LANES-Hingham not immune to domestic violence.”

Ms. Bennett has written a thoughtful article and one that should be read by all. She does not judge women who are in domestic violent relationships but provides resources for them to use.

Ms. Bennett also educates us as to what domestic violence is and its many forms. She also points out that the woman who looks like she is living the perfe...


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What to Make of Statistics

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Monday, February 8, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

Statistics are meant to make a point.

Take this statistic for instance; 4.8 million women are either physically abused or raped by an intimate partner each year that according to The National Center for Injury Prevention and Control. 4,800,000 is a big number no matter how you express it.

But let’s now take a real close look at that number.  If 4,800,000 women are physically abused or raped by an intimate partner annually that equates to 13,150 women who are physically abused or raped by...


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A Light

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Friday, February 5, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

TheTownTalk.com is making a effort to bring the problems of domestic violence to the forefront.  Recently TheTownTalk.com has published two articles regarding domestic violence, one on February 4th and another on February 5th.

One article in TheTownTalk.com which serves Alexandria, Pineville and Central Louisiana titled “Our View: Victims of Abuse Need Help -- Right Now” points out that Louisiana has the highest rates of deaths due to domestic violence, this according to the FBI.

Some...


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The Law of Circulation

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Thursday, February 4, 2010, In : I AM Prosperous 

Charitable giving is considered by most people as a discretionary expense. In other words if after all living expenses like the roof over our head and food on the table and other necessary items are paid and we have money left over we can choose to give money to charitable organizations we would like to support.

The Business of Me takes a different view of this as we believe that charitable giving should be a fixed expense. We believe this because of what is known as “The Law of Circulatio...


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Honoring Olivia Marchand and Karen LeDuc

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Wednesday, February 3, 2010, In : Domestic Violence 

Olivia Marchand and Karen LeDuc came from the same small town of Westford MA. Both were victims of homicides, Olivia was shot to death by her Dad (yes I said her Dad) and her Mom was also shot but has survived.

Karen LeDuc was allegedly shot to death by her husband. The small town of Westford MA is shaken by these 2 domestic violence shootings.

According to the District Attorney Gerry Leone when speaking about Karen LeDuc, “There may have been marital discord and there may have bee...


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Nancy Salamone


Nancy Salamone’s career and personal accomplishments are vast and varied. For more than three decades Nancy has shown extraordinary leadership during her business career and through her personal endeavors. Her accomplishments include 25 years as an executive for major Wall Street financial services companies, her devotion to “giving back” through her non-profit work, her teaching and her visionary creation of “The Business of Me”, a curriculum that teaches financial self-sufficiency to women survivors of domestic violence. Write to me at nancy(@)thebusinessofme.com or for general information write to info(@)thebusinessofme.com. We look forward to hearing from you.

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